


Have You Ever Wanted to Hate Someone?

by SecretMaker



Series: Tumblr Drabbles 2015 [124]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Ezzy made me do it, Hate Sex with a Happy Ending, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-12
Updated: 2015-11-12
Packaged: 2018-05-01 06:37:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5195870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SecretMaker/pseuds/SecretMaker
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff"><p>
  <a href="http://notsuchasecret.tumblr.com">Tumblr</a>
</p></blockquote>





	Have You Ever Wanted to Hate Someone?

10-10-15  
Prompt: “Have you ever wanted to hate someone?”  
Pairing: KyoHaba  
Rating: Explicit  
  
It was supposed to be a way to relieve tension, to get all their aggression out in the open and work through it so that they could work together on the court. Hate sex, that’s what Oikawa had said almost a year before, and the phrase had stuck in Shigeru’s head.  
  
But looking down at Kyoutani’s broad, muscled back as he worked his fingers in and out of his ass, Shigeru wondered if he had ever really hated him at all. He certainly didn’t hate him now. His fingers twitched, pressing down on Kyoutani’s prostate, and damn if the moan that tore from Kyoutani wasn’t the most beautiful thing he had ever heard. Shigeru pulls his fingers away so that Kyoutani won’t notice them trembling and sets about tearing open the condom package.  
  
When he pushed in it was slow and controlled, like the first push always was. They may have started this affair with violence and anger, but Shigeru would never be so cruel as to intentionally hurt Kyoutani like this. If for no other reason, he needed the ace to be at his best on the court.  
  
What was different this time was the way he moved after Kyoutani grunted that he was ready. He pulled out slow and eased back in. He rocked gently against Kyoutani, grinding down against his prostate whenever he could. He let his hands wander across Kyoutani’s back, mapping out the gorgeous lines and dips there.   
  
God, he was so beautiful.  
  
Everything about him, from the definition of his body to the shade of his skin made Shigeru feel like he was on fire. Even the acne scars across his shoulders and the heavy bags under his eyes were ethereal to Shigeru’s eyes. Trembling, he pulled out entirely.  
  
“What are you-” Kyoutani started, but Shigeru cut him off.  
  
“Roll over,” he said.  
  
“What?”  
  
“Roll over. I want to see your face.” Shigeru’s hands were shaking. Now that the words were out, he was terrified of Kyoutani’s reaction. There was a long moment of silence.  
  
“No,” Kyoutani said. “I- I can’t.”  
  
“Why not?” Shigeru asked. Kyoutani’s shoulders were starting to tremble and he found himself reaching out without thinking and settling his palm between them. “Kyoutani, what’s wrong?”  
  
“I can’t do this if you’re gonna be nice to me,” he answered. His voice was trembling and Shigeru swore he heard a sniffle. He took his hand away and crawled up the bed so that he could sit cross-legged near Kyoutani’s head. He reached out again, this time settling his hand in Kyoutani’s hair.  
  
“It’s alright,” he said softly. “It’s just me.” Kyoutani flinched, but he looked up at last, and Shigeru had to bite back a gasp.  
  
Tears were rolling down Kyoutani’s cheeks, and from the state of his eyes they had been for quite a while. Shigeru cradled his face with both hands, using his thumbs to wipe them away, feeling tears of his own prick at his eyes.  
  
“Please tell me what’s wrong,” he whispered. “I thought you agreed to tell me if I was hurting you.”  
  
“’Snot that kind of hurt,” Kyoutani mumbled, looking down.   
  
“Then what is it?” Kyoutani was blushing, leaning back so that he could sit on his heels.  
  
“You were bein’ so gentle,” he said so softly that Shigeru almost couldn’t hear it. “It was like you were…”  
  
“Like I was what?” Shigeru prompted, trying to keep his own voice even. “Please, Kyoutani, tell me how I can fix this.”  
  
“Don’t- don’t make love to me if you don’t love me,” Kyoutani said at last. Shigeru’s breath caught in his throat.  
  
 _So that was it._  
  
That was what the tremble in Shigeru’s hands was, and the heat under his skin. That was what had slowed his movements today, and that was what had made Kyoutani cry. Shigeru shuffled forward until his knees were pressed against Kyoutani’s.  
  
“I won’t,” he promised. “Can we start over?” Kyoutani nodded, scrubbing the last of the tears away. Shigeru placed a hand on his chest to ease him onto his back and he went without protest.  
  
Shigeru crawled between his legs and lined himself up. He pressed in just as slowly as ever, looking up to catch Kyoutani’s eye as he did so. He started to rock into him, and before Kyoutani could voice the anger rising up on his face he leaned down and kissed him.  
  
 _We’ve never kissed before,_ he thought, closing his eyes and whimpering into it. Kyoutani’s mouth opened in surprise and Shigeru used that to his advantage, deepening the kiss. His lungs and his eyes were both burning when he pulled away, the tears escaping at last when he looked down at Kyoutani’s shocked face.  
  
“Kentarou,” he whispered, rocking a little harder. “God, Kentarou, you’re so perfect. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, I didn’t realize, god, I-” He sobbed, hiding his face against Kyoutani’s shoulder. “I wanted to hate you. I really did. I thought it’d be easier if I hated you, because I know you hate me. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to- I love you.”  
  
Kyoutani arched against him, his entire body going tense. He tightened wildly around Shigeru, throwing him headlong over the edge as he came in rough spurts between them. Shigeru trembled and clutched at Kyoutani’s shoulders, sobbing. Just when he thought he was going to have to leave, going to have to run and never speak to Kyoutani again, a pair of strong arms wrapped around him, crushing him to Kyoutani’s chest. His hair grew wet as Kyoutani shook against him, whispering his name over and over in the dark of his bedroom.  
  
“I love you too, Shigeru,” he sobbed. Shigeru clutched him tighter, not sure if he was laughing or crying anymore. It was probably both.  
  
“We’re a fucking mess,” he said.  
  
“You’re a mess,” Kyoutani retorted, his voice trembling. “I’m fuckin’ peachy.”  
  
Shigeru laughed, freeing himself enough to wipe at his face and look down at the boy beneath him.  
  
Kyoutani was smiling, his eyes warm. Shigeru’s heart skipped a beat as he stared.  
  
“Kiss me again,” he whispered. Shigeru was all too happy to comply.

**Author's Note:**

> [Tumblr](http://notsuchasecret.tumblr.com)


End file.
